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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

If I Didn't Run You Over In Reverse Then I'm Not Still Mad

Today we delve back in to my 8 part series on the 7 deadly sins. Todays sin of choice: Wrath.
See, apparently every time I flip some one off in traffic, I'm committing the sin of wrath, or as it is most commonly known as the sin of anger.
Early religious figures chastised people for being angry. They all realized that profiteering off of war efforts was much easier with a cool head.
But outside of a war economy, what else is anger good for? Well, I am glad you asked. See anger is actually very beneficial to overall human development and social interactions.
For one, anger tends to make people think more optimistically. Such as when that guy cut me off on the interstate, I knew I could side swipe him and take him off the road. And I was right!
Angry people tend to get more pay increases in the job market. After all, how many employers want to deny a raise to a guy that punches holes in the wall or yells at them during meetings?
Health studies have found that people that are perpetually angry have less chance of developing heart disease. That's why there is that bitter old man living next door that still yells and threatens to shoot the neighbors kids.
Anger also helps build communities. Nothing brings people together better than talking about why they hate someone different.
Anger also helps one focus on the superficial instead of the details. We all know we think too much anyway, so I say just go with it.
Most religions were more worried about people taking revenge on those that angered them. They thought that justice should be shown through the court system of the time. I know always feel better to be given one of my neighbors goats after he killed one of my children.
Dante Alighieri placed the sin of anger on the 5th circle of hell. There in a swamp the angry and the slothful would gather and while the slothful drowned in their sin, the angry would bite, kick and punch each other in the face. That sounds more like an MMA event than a punishment. Serve some stale beer and over priced hot wings and thats a typical Saturday night for many.
According to King David, angry people have to be rescued. I guess Superman didn't get that memo. He should have just let Lois fall to her death and instead tried to rescue Lex Luthor. In my experience, its generally the person I'm angry at that needs to be rescued. Unless I'm outnumbered then this holds true.
Islam calls anger the root of all evil, which is almost how I feel. After all, a root grows into a tree which grows branches. Which I can beat you with.

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