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Saturday, April 23, 2011

Let's Pretend We Are Rabbits And I'll Hide Something With Your Eggs

Sometimes I think my life is a Will Ferrel movie, because I just want to punch someone in the face.
Which is why in sex I take the motto "If your not 1st  your last."
But a few days ago I realized on another blog how much I do channel Mr Ferrel when I started rambling on about Jesus, in a manner consistent with Taladega Nights and his George Bush impressions. See a fellow blogger on here that I follow had all these pictures of a creepy and obsessive stalkerish looking Jesus and I found it a bit unnerving at first. But the more he stared at me the more I realized that I liked Creepy Jesus. See this Jesus is relatable to me, he looks like the guy that sits and talks to himself while eating nachos.
My actual montage is as follows (warning this could be construed as irreverent, but trust me it is all said with love):
"I think from now on I will make all my prayers care of creepy and staring at me Jesus! My dear Creepy-Staring Jesus! O Holy looking at me through the binoclears from the neighbors house Jesus! Our dear kind and carving our names into your leg Jesus! Great following you home and mumbling about the dog telling you to do things Jesus! Amazing, keeps tabs on me and leaves me random pictures of places I have been, pictures that have me in there, pictures that were taken without my knowledge or my consent Jesus! Yeah, I like that Jesus!"

See, what is more showing of love than a guy that tattoos or carves your name somewhere on his body? And he cares so much he keeps tabs on my life! Sure, we celebrate his resurrection by worshipping rabbits and playing ancient fertility games, but its only cause we like playing hard to get.
I say this year lets proclaim our devotion by piercing each other in remembrance for the piercings he earned being nailed to a cross. And then, if he resurrects us, we will each know his love.
Or if that is a little extreme, we can continue to follow my normal Easter tradition of finding some one to play rabbits with....

1 comment:

  1. Hahahahaha! Oh I will have to post Mr. Jebus again!!