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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Your Love Makes Me Wanna...

Its springtime, and like my outlook on life, its all a little hazy.
As the world around me comes to life and people laugh and love, I sit alone drinking coffee. After all love is completely overrated. I would like to get it banned.
So today, I am starting a revolution. Every guy that's been stood up, I am ur battle cry. To every man, who's love of their life leaves them for a guy they haven't seen in almost 20 years...I am calling to you.
To any woman, who's been made to feel not worthy because some jack ass cheated or intentionally hurt you, I will be your champion.
We will march against Spring. Stand up to Hallmark. And abolish Valentines Day.
Why should the people that suck find happiness at our expense? I say let's burn this motherf****r down!
That cute little waitress you've flirted with for two weeks won't meet you for coffee? Set her car on fire to show her what she missed out on!
Ladies, that dive instructor guy blows you off? Burn an effigy in front of his business, this way he sees how devoted you would have been!
I say, let's hold monthly meetings, sing camp fire songs like "I broke the antenna of his Cavalier" or "I hooked up with her sister for spite".
We can dance, laugh and giggle in our shared apathy.
Maybe have a bake sale.
Or a "I wouldn't date you without being paid" auction.
These could raise money for our cause.
Instead of a kissing booth, we could charge to slap people.
I think I am on to something here...1st meeting of Vengeful Hearts Club starts on Tuesday. Bring photos to burn and I will supply candles alcohol and if you're cute to set the mood.


  1. I love the bake sale idea. Too bad I'm not in the dating game any longer because I love to cook, especially bake things.

  2. lol well u can be an honorary member then!