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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

By The Power Of Bats And Lanterns Light I Proclaim My Team Is Better Than Yours, Because It Is Mine

Fanboyism. I wish I could take credit for this word like I did when I created Valemercialism. But the word fanboyism already exists. Its defined as an attitude of supreme arrogance related to a specific idea, concept, platform or lifestyle.
The reason I'm defining this word today is because I have seen it manifested in many ways. Its the urge that overtakes a person to rapidly defend a video game, a sports team, a novel, or a movie. In many ways these urges defy reason. No, Harry Potter wouldn't make a good President. Because he's not real. And Superman can't renounce citizenship to a country he doesn't exist in. And the Xbox 360 isn't better than the PS3 because they have almost the same games on both.
Yet, people will fight and argue and name call over what they feel is true to these characters or their beliefs. I think they should just get a girlfriend. But wait, what about those that have girlfriends? What's their excuse? Well, they are called sports fans.
See, fanboys are a type of geek that dresses up like their favorite superhero, video game character or sports team. Except on Halloween, I've never understood the urge to paint myself to look like the Minnesota Vikings, drink beer, and sit half naked in the snow screaming about how much more awesome I am as a fan because I look stupid.
This goes for movie premieres too. I counted three guys at the Thor premiere wearing viking helmets and carrying plastic hammers. At least be authentic and buy a real war hammer. Or better yet, don't wear armor. It looks as ridiculous as having a mime in the operating room. Or how many ugly Hermione's did you see at the last Harry Potter? Listen ladies, if you don't look exactly like the character, don't dress up like the character. Wearing robes and carrying a twig or a broom doesn't qualify you as a witch. It may qualify you as the cat lady though...
But fanboyism isn't always a bad thing. Like when beautiful women dress up as japanese anime characters with names I can't pronounce. Or when they try and look like Lara Croft from Tomb Raider or they dress up as Playboy Bunnies, just because.
In fact I think it is safe to say that beautiful women are allowed to dress up anyway they want anytime they want. Men on the other hand, if you aren't built like a superhero...don't wear spandex. I'd like to keep my lunch thanks.
Really the only places that are acceptable for costumed role playing are comic conventions, E3, Halloween, and that party you have with that creepy neighbor who wants you to find change in his pocket.
Sure I may run around in my Green Lantern under roos but at least only one person has to see me in them. And after she does, she probably wouldn't want to again.


  1. I would want to see them again!!! I would not be afraid, lol!!!

  2. Well...maybe she would want to lmao