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Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Tell Me The Tale You Would Like To Hear

I have always wanted to live a fairy tale. And while I am usually stuck in the role of beast and awaiting a beauty that can see past the monster, Jessie Dobinson prefers to live out the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears.
Taking a cue from the classic tale, Jessie breaks into peoples homes to try their food and then he finds the most comfortable bed and takes a nap. Afterwards, he steals the best valuables and leaves to find his next victim.
Aside from the larceny and the fact he also robbed someone at knifepoint and committed assault on a man dressed up in a bear costume, I can find no fault in Jessie. After all, he's living his dream. And who am I to deny him his happily ever after.
At a mere 19 years of age, young Jessie has evaded police in London for over a week now. His short blonde hair may not be as long as his fairy tale inspired icon, but it shines just as bright.
Jessie is wanted for breaking into the same house twice in less than a week. Both times he ate the food of the home owner and both times he took a nap in the house.
Then he returned to the same home and shot the home owner in the chest with a bb gun.
I think he thought the home owner was a bear. I can't blame him as I hate bears as well.
But this brings up an interesting concept. Living in fairy tales.
I think there should be a bed and breakfast concept that has you actual experience all the ups and downs of specific fairy tales. Maybe you could rappel down Rapunzel's tower. Or take a carriage ride in a giant pumpkin. A submarine voyage through an underwater kingdom. Ball room dancing. Elegant clothing. Maybe even some animatronic animals like at Disney to guide you through your journey.
Maybe three wishes and a magic carpet ride is your fantasy...I know what I would wish for!
Or maybe to go from zero to hero for a weekend. Whatever your desire, this place could make it real. The entire staff could be catered to your particular story. The food could be specific to your tale as could the attire. It would be like a cool version of a renaissance fair. (Although I am not into sword play.)
Happy endings probably cost extra though. Unless your fantasy is Mulan. Then it is appropriate.
Anyone wanting to start this bed and breakfast has my permission, you only need to set me up in   one of the dungeons...because after all...everyone knows beauty never really chooses a beast.


  1. the B & B idea sounds like a twisted version of the old show Fantasy Island

  2. wow..ok that was really interesting!!!Do you always write like this?? I love to write, but I'm a bit rusty...I'm like wow!!!

  3. yes. I do tend to always write this way. Sometimes its funny. Sometimes cynical. And always reflecting my pain.

  4. LOL, always giving me a chuckle... ;) I have watched pretty much ALL of these fairy tales in the last oh... I don't know... week. On TV of course, because as we already know, I'm not living them.

  5. Neither am I. But I wouldn't mind it. I think though I get cast into the villain role and left hung out to dry...