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Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Amina Tell You Something, This Hoax Has Gone To Far

The world is outraged and shocked at the revelation of Amina Abdullah not being who she claims she was. Readers, for those of you that have no idea who Amina Abdullah is, don't feel bad, because until a few minutes ago, I did not either.
See Amina is a "out lesbian" who blogs on the political and economical situations in Syria. She has talked of her ridicule and her struggles. She has talked about the reforms and has become a leading voice in the blogger sphere for womens rights and equality. She had attracted almost 15,000 followers...that is 1,000 times more than the followers I have publically following me.
She was in the words of some of her readers "an inspiration to women everywhere".
The only problem is...Amina...is a man baby, yeah.
See, trouble for Amina began when the actual writer of the blog 40 year old Tom MacMaster got tired of writing it. He was having a hard time relating to being a 20 something year old girl. I mean after you discuss first periods, what else is there left to talk about right?
So, Tom, now out of ideas, decided to spice things up a bit. And he posted as Aminas cousin or sister or friend or maybe even a pet...I can't keep up with all his alter egos. Anyways...he posted under a different pseudonym that Amina had been kidnapped by the government.
This didn't sit well with fans of the "Girl from Damascus". So readers, began to post things on Facebook like, "Free Amina" and "Lesbians Can Be Muslims Too" and "If She Is As Hot As She Sounds In Her Blog, Heres My Number." Of course that last one was my sign...Imagine my shock when I found out she was indeed no where near as hot as her blog made her out to be.
After a few days of the media running with the story, Tom felt he had to come clean and he outted himself as the creator of a hoax. Kind of like that hoax with McDonalds, only in this case no one was amused.
He apologized and said, "even though everything I wrote was a lie, it was all true."
Wait...What? So, not only do you have the balls (that Amina wasn't supposed to have) to make up this young womans plight in Syria, but then you have the cajones to say its all "based" on a true story?
Tom went on to imply that he felt as though he "had created a voice" that he would enjoy using at parties and local events, like drag shows, to speak on the important issues.
He also implied he would enjoy being "touched by his readers".
Tom writes in his apology as if Amina were an alternate personaility that he couldn't control. She expressed herself over and over and he was powerless to stop her. He seems to claim that she used him to spread her propaganda.
However, the majority of his fans were not in the mood for his bad joke. They have expressed anger and outrage to his blatant manipulation.
Which leads me to a confession readers...I am not that handsome guy that you see in those pictures there...no I am actually a goldfish. I wait for my owner to go to work or school and then I write about the issues that affect goldfish all over the world. As an openly expressive aquatic creature, I find that it is hard to type without fingers or the ability to breathe out of the water.
But now you know my secret...I am sorry I perpetuated this hoax...I never expected people to like the person I pretended to be...I mean I tried to stop, but somewhere in my goldfish mind was this person longing to escape...I am going back to my coy pond now...I hope you will let me continue to be a voice to touch your hearts and I appreciate all of you letting me get my fins in you.
And now you understand why I hate bears.

9 comments:

  1. i take deep breaths and flop around on the keyboard and use spell check for misspelled words...then the cat usually helps me back into my bowl

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  2. LMAO!!! Good one Ben the Goldfish!!

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  3. I don't like lava lamps. I'm very afraid of them, actually. I like bears. You probably like lava lamps. It's okay.

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  4. Lava Lamps are pretty...in a amorpheous blob kind of way

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  5. I dont like bears either cause brick on anchorman says they smell menstration. He may be on to something. I dont know but they will cause trouble for you . Like some we know they start off all friendly and cuddly and fuzzy and whatnot then they snap and try to eat you.

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  6. My point exactly!!!! They pretend to be caring but all they care about is do you taste good with lemon

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  7. LMAO!!! Oh dear... A goldfish... Somehow I pictured you more as a porcupine or maybe alligator? Hahahahaaaaa... Sounds like there was a little Schizophrenia involved in the creation of Amina... Wow, props to the crazies.

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  8. I must note that Mr MacMaster has now blocked me from being able to follow his blog...I do not know if it is because he hates Goldfish or the color purple.

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