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Thursday, November 17, 2011

I Remember You Fondling Me...I mean Fondly

A parent is up in arms in the great state of South Carolina over the use of first graders as massage therapists. Brenda Norris, proud grandparent, is angered that a teacher from Batesburg-Leesville Primary School (BLPS) made her six year old grand daughter rub her feet all day! I say that teacher is just trying to help her learn a trade! With this poor economy, teaching kids important skills can help in all aspects of life! This jot only helps her learn a marketable skill, but also teaches her the value of hard work! After all, the only reason Brenda found out was because the little girl came home complaining!
I think Brenda should teach her grand kids not to be such whiners! Think of all the other benefits from this - this girl will be ready for the stereotypical duties of being a wife! The demeaning actions of rubbing a strange woman's feet will prepare her for all the demeaning tasks her husband will make of her!
It's just the new way to handle the vo-tech program!
If I had known that this was the easiest way to get a massage, I may have stayed working in the education industry!
In other news from the great state of South Carolina, Dr. Daniel Caddell is accused of groping two female patients. But I think he was just checking for lumps and vaginal elasticity while they were under anesthesia. These women should be thanking him for being so concerned! If he had found cancer, would these women be complaining? Maybe this should be considered preventative maintenance!
It's not like it is motivated by lust, because this is a man in a position of trust! He would never betray that to cop a feel on a woman paying him to cop feels! Otherwise that would make him a high priced prostitute that can prescribe penicillin to make the burning go away!
The health care industry already screws us over by charging us $900 for a Q-Tip, so at least these women got something in return...Most likely crabs!
Dr. Caddell is completely surprised by these accusations, probably because the roofies he usually prescribes suppress all memory! Maybe he should have bought American!
Many patients have come in to stand up for Daniel, probably because it was the only action many of them had gotten in a long time!
South Carolina I love this new progressive teaching and healing techniques, just make sure not to rub me the wrong way!

1 comment:

  1. I asked a young woman who worked in a local day spa what she made a year and she said "around $50k before taxes" Then she added, "but that doesn't include tips."

    I then asked her how many clients she's had who complained or were otherwise negative. In five years she says she thinks she's had one but she can't remember for certain.

    I think that the grandmother should fast-track that little girl towards what is obviously a good paying job because the teacher clearly sees she has innate talent and these things should be nurtured.