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Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Stalking You From 30,000 Feet

Facebook has taken over most of our lives. To say that Facebook is THE prominent social network would be to underscore the more than 800 million users. Give or take 400 million users since many of the people that friend request me are porn stars or people with multiple personality disorder.
But regardless, the fact remains that Facebook is used by a majority of people and this presents many new business opportunities. Which is why I applaud Dutch airline company KLM.
KLM is taking profile stalking to the mile high club with their innovative new way of picking seats on their flights. Passengers link their Facebook profiles to their tickets and can then look at other passengers profiles to decide who they wish to sit next too.
KLM refers to this as a "bite sized date." I have to admit that the idea of being trapped in a confined space with a total stranger that only chose to sit next to me because they wanted to fondle me is kind of romantic. I see this being especially favorable for women! How many of you ladies wouldn't get excited to take a four hour flight next to a guy that thought you looked hot in your pictures and "wants to get to know you better" and unlike 'real' dates you can't just walk out on dessert! This sounds like every Facebook stalker's dream come true. I wonder if flight attendants will offer pepper spray along with the in-flight movie?
Imagine if we started using this method for other venues...
We could watch movies right beside people that we try to avoid! That guy that friended you on Facebook a few weeks back - well he's buying the theater seat right next to you! He's even booked your spot in the concession line! Employers and school officials could stop by the theater and see if you really are sick or if you are just skipping work by checking for your Facebook listing!
We could book seats at tables at restaurants this way too! Imagine going to the China Buffet and that guy that has been creeping you at work decides to book the chair at your table! Then you can have all those conversations that you have been running from since he started!
Or how about deciding when to shower at the gym based on who else will be showering at the time? That sounds like a great idea Gold's!
As privacy becomes a thing of the past all we can do is creep forward. Besides, it's not profile stalking if you are using that profile to find out where someone is going on vacation to ensure that you can fly alongside of them! 

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