As a train hurtled towards them, the horse faced certain death with a smile and Charles puked over the side of his saddle bags...fortunately the police were able to get the train stopped long before it endangered the dynamic duo, but this didn't help the cops with their biggest problem - how do you get a drunk man off of a 900lb animal? It's not like they could just shoot him! After all, the horse was black and think of the media shitstorm that would have caused if they missed Charles and hit the horse! People would have said the cops were
Finally, Charles knew he was caught, so he did what any reasonable man would do in this situation - he flipped the bird and took off on foot. Cops quickly overtook the man as he ran...and by ran, I mean he stumbled aimlessly and tripped over his own feet.
Charles isn't the only one to be recently arrested for this crime. Back in September of 2004, a case came before the Supreme Court of Pennsylvania involving a defendant named Noel. The Court ruled that because the horse is a living animal, it didn't qualify as a vehicle so Noel couldn't be charged with a D.U.I.
I think next week I will go to Philadelphia, get drunk, and ride a lion around town - so not only do I not have to worry about a D.U.I, but my DD comes with claws!
After all, what possible dangers could a living, thinking creature pose if the person experienced in handling it is three-sheets to the wind and screaming "go faster, bulls-eye" into its ears.
Charles was also charged with cruelty to animals, which I can only assume is because he disrespected his designated driver by not offering to buy him dinner. After all, if it were cruel to handle horses while drunk, we would have laws against it...